Bring on the Fruit!!

I am such a happy person right now!! My bf had to go out of town for work, and will be gone 4 days. As the pantry and fridge was nearlt empty, I saw an amazing opportunity! I brought my happy ass to the store and got sparkling water, apples, clementines, kiwis, raspberries, blueberries, strawberries, bananas, a pineapple, almond milk, carrots, and oil free hummus!! That is all I have to eat until he gets home 😊 I am so excited! I weighed in at 138.8 last night after an unexpected going away dinner with wine, calamari, bread, and eggplant parmagiana. I didnt want to ruin the mood, so I ate everything 😑 gross gross gross. Aaaaaanyways I now have 4 days to eat as little as I want, and really clean my system out with all of this raw produce. I plan to do this for at least a week. I think by the end of this long weekend, I will be down to 136. I am holding on to so much water and food weight from last night, so maybe I can lose even more? It's going to be much easier to get into the groove of things without my bf being around. I love the man, but his diet is very meat heavy and full of  convenience foods.  Maybe my new vegan ways will have a positive influence on him?

Another Day

I am just getting off of a 24 hour shift, and I am exhausted! Too tired to even have an appetite lol
They brought us breakfast today:
3 Boiled egg whites = 51
V8 Juice= 30
Potatoes= 100
=181

It's still a little lighter than my usual breakfast of toast and PB (215)

I am almost off, and I will probably sleep right through lunch. I wish I could skip dinner too.
My bf wants to have meatball subs 😑
That will be about 250 for bread, 200 for meatballs, 50 for cheese, and 50 for sauce? These are rough estimations. I'll have to check for sure when I get home. How is everyone else doing today?

-Åurora

Going Strong

Today's food Diary

Breakfast:
Toast- 120
PB-95
Jam-20

Lunch:
Cajun grilled chicken- 170
Green beans- 60
Roll- 100
Tea-0

Snack:
Red Bull 110

Dinner :
Wonton Soup- 150

Total= 825

Pretty good, but I should have not had the roll, and traded the Red Bull for coffee. I could have saved 200 cal... oh well! I refuse to give up

Pro Ana Buddies

Hello all!
I had a bit of an idea today. On my old blog, I had a page that people could leave their contact information on, and find new pro ana buddies. Is this an idea I should revive? Let me know!

-Åurora

900 Calorie Challenge for September!!

I absolutely adore Autumn!!! Theres just something about the crisp air and cozy atmosphere that really get me going. This Autumn, I want to be the girl with skinny thighs and popping collar bones, hiding under big sweaters, leggings, thigh high socks and fuzzy scarves 😊 I want my thigh gap back so badly!! I think last time, it started when my weigh fell just under 130 lbs.  Autumn doesn't  technically  start for about 3 weeks. I figure dropping 10 lbs in that time should be easy enough. Since September is the 9th month, I am going to do a 900 calorie or less a day challenge.  I burn about 2300 calories a day, giving me a daily deficit of 1400 a day×7= 9800 calorie deficit per week. That is 2.8 lbs gone every week!!! In 3 weeks I will be down 8.4 of pure fat, which should put me right under 130.  If I up my exercise and eat really clean,  I'm positive I can lose  more and shed some water weight Ahhh!! I can not wait to be under that number again. It has been over a year, and I have to get back there!

Here is my intake plan for today:

Breakfast-

Toast with natural peanut butter=215

3 egg whites= 51

And v8 juice= 30

Lunch

 Tuna =60 

and a peach= 60 

Leaving me with 484 cal for dinner. This is the hardest meal to avoid for me because of my Bf watching. I already have a big pot of homemade lentil and veggie soup in the slow cooker for dinner that is really light. It's  made of veggie broth, lentils, carrots, onion, corn, broccoli, cauliflower, and mushrooms. A bowl should only be around 200 cal at the most. I'm  estimating high just to be safe.  I wont have any bread or cheese with it to keep  things extra light,  and come in under 900 today!!

Anybody want to join me?

Xoxo Åurora

Setting Ourselves up for Failure?

I read the other day that telling other people about a goal you wish to accomplish satisfies your brain in the same way that actually accomplishing the goal does. So essentially, if you tell people before you do it, you lessen your chances of success. So keep your weight loss a delicious little secret 😛

I saw pictures of myself from the grip of Ana last time, when I was 20 lbs lighter than I am now. I am horrified at what I have become 😶 and this motivates me to severely cut weight. I want to go even lower than last time. My bf is about to have surgery in a few weeks, so he wont be able to really monitor what I'm eating. I hope he is so concerned with his recovery that he doesn't really notice that I'm shrinking away to nothing. 800 calories a day until October? Absolutely

Abysmal Failure

I'm disgusting
I hate what I've become
FUCK FUCK FUCK
I need to escape with ana and be free